So off I go to weigh in yesterday, super excited, because I have been a very good girl, when I discover to my horror and disbelief, I have only lost a measly 200g.
"But I don't understand," I cry, really frustrated.
I have been excercising like a demon, getting my groove on, drinking dams of water and eating well.
My group leaders starts giving me the spanish inquisition about my habits, and I tell her.
And this is the real funny part, she looks at me and says: "You not eating enough."
Excuse me, isnt that how I got to this state in the first place?
No, she says I am not eating enough carbs and protein and I am not eating often enough and I have to eat up all my points....
NOw, Im really bad at eating often, Im worse at eating carbs, and I never get through all my points.
I have to point out though that I don't thing the beer helped my cause much, bad idea number 352!
I got so frustrated, i ate a chocolate!
But ah, wonders never cease, i might not be losing weight, but Im losing cm, two by two, and really fast... why hasn't the scale caught on?
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Monday, April 27, 2009
Music and Beer
At risk of sounding like an alcoholic, I think I have found another weakness besides chocolate...
The chocolate cravings have finally subsided, but I made a terrible mistake in saying hello to an old friend this weekend.
I haven't quite got used to going to a music festival and not drinking, not for any other reason than it is one of the few times I let my hair down.
Seeing as though beer has fewer points than virtually everything else, I decided to open my heart to an old love.
I have always been the beer swigging, rugby watching, really cool guy with long hair, untill I actually started thinking about rather being seen as a girl.
I tried drinking more ladylike drinks, but nothing comes close to the delicious taste of an ice cold beer.
Problem is though, beer makes me hungry, and while I applaud myself for showing serious self control, I could have eaten my way through an entire McDonalds branch if you let me!
Oprah would probably say that I am making progress in terms of figuring out how I picked up my weight.
But surely the amount of jumping up and down I do at a festival helps me work of the beer?
Heaven knows I probably sweat most of it out in my rock induced trance...
But talking of trances, be warned that drinking red wine, and then spending time alone is not advisable.
I am sure that someday I will regain my confidence (I think of it as I am just getting rid of the dust that has settled over my confidence when I forgot it existed) but for now, I still spend a lot of time thinking about whats wrong with me, when logically I know (and this I preach to others) for everything that might not be cool, there are two really brilliant things that make me quiky...
woah, this became serious, Im off to grab a beer!
The chocolate cravings have finally subsided, but I made a terrible mistake in saying hello to an old friend this weekend.
I haven't quite got used to going to a music festival and not drinking, not for any other reason than it is one of the few times I let my hair down.
Seeing as though beer has fewer points than virtually everything else, I decided to open my heart to an old love.
I have always been the beer swigging, rugby watching, really cool guy with long hair, untill I actually started thinking about rather being seen as a girl.
I tried drinking more ladylike drinks, but nothing comes close to the delicious taste of an ice cold beer.
Problem is though, beer makes me hungry, and while I applaud myself for showing serious self control, I could have eaten my way through an entire McDonalds branch if you let me!
Oprah would probably say that I am making progress in terms of figuring out how I picked up my weight.
But surely the amount of jumping up and down I do at a festival helps me work of the beer?
Heaven knows I probably sweat most of it out in my rock induced trance...
But talking of trances, be warned that drinking red wine, and then spending time alone is not advisable.
I am sure that someday I will regain my confidence (I think of it as I am just getting rid of the dust that has settled over my confidence when I forgot it existed) but for now, I still spend a lot of time thinking about whats wrong with me, when logically I know (and this I preach to others) for everything that might not be cool, there are two really brilliant things that make me quiky...
woah, this became serious, Im off to grab a beer!
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Weigh-in day
Ah weigh-in day.
You eat as little as possible and drink as much as possible, in the hope of fooling the scale.
According to my crummy bathroom scale, I was doing really well, but then of course, weight watchers don't use a bathroom scale, they use something that looks like it would be used by a butcher.
I hear it's very acurate. No amount of shifting my weight around could bring my weight down, and for all my exercising and eating healthy and trying to be a table tennis, I lost the grand total sum of (drum roll please) a WHOPPING 800g.
The funny thing though, and this could just be pure imagination talking here (maybe the lack of chocolate is making me go insane), all my clothes are really starting to feel looser.
Nevermind that, people are noticing.
My friends think I have lost a whole lot of weight.
It actually a kinda cool feeling to have other people notice that you are doing something.
Of course, I had to cheat a little, and had an entire lammington and two lovely cupcakes (they were small, ok!)
I might also have eaten a couple of highly fatty date balls, but damn they were good.
As any addict will tell you, the road to recovery is long and hard, and sometimes steep, so steep that you might tumble off the back of the bloody wagon.
I hear it's important that you get straight back on again, but I was still a little in shock from the fall, so it was nice to just sit there for a while...
You eat as little as possible and drink as much as possible, in the hope of fooling the scale.
According to my crummy bathroom scale, I was doing really well, but then of course, weight watchers don't use a bathroom scale, they use something that looks like it would be used by a butcher.
I hear it's very acurate. No amount of shifting my weight around could bring my weight down, and for all my exercising and eating healthy and trying to be a table tennis, I lost the grand total sum of (drum roll please) a WHOPPING 800g.
The funny thing though, and this could just be pure imagination talking here (maybe the lack of chocolate is making me go insane), all my clothes are really starting to feel looser.
Nevermind that, people are noticing.
My friends think I have lost a whole lot of weight.
It actually a kinda cool feeling to have other people notice that you are doing something.
Of course, I had to cheat a little, and had an entire lammington and two lovely cupcakes (they were small, ok!)
I might also have eaten a couple of highly fatty date balls, but damn they were good.
As any addict will tell you, the road to recovery is long and hard, and sometimes steep, so steep that you might tumble off the back of the bloody wagon.
I hear it's important that you get straight back on again, but I was still a little in shock from the fall, so it was nice to just sit there for a while...
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Diets and Deadlines
The two don't go together, period. Speaking of which, that's another thing that shouldn't come anywhere near a diet.
I discovered this, well, on deadline- could nobody have prepared me for this?
Yes, I am struggling.
A computer crisis is also a good time to start rethinking things.
Usually, when I am stuck at my desk, typing away like a possesed machine, I take a break by stuffing my face.
The sweet things work wonders for keeping me awake while my eyes slowly turn square, but then of course, like with any dependancy, as soon as the rush is over, I need a next fix.
I am drinking water though, and fruits are sweet and good for munching.
I'm still trying to conclude the internal debate my mind is having on the subject of table tennis, but hey, weight watchers says it counts as excercise...
Another little feel good thing I have been doing is walking instead of taking a taxi.
I am told that this is actually working, and that people can see it in my clothes, but I still feel like a stuffed animal.
Just the thought of it could send me to chocolate...
Forgive me chocolate god, for I have sinned, it has been a week since my last chocolate, and I'm not doing to badly :D
I discovered this, well, on deadline- could nobody have prepared me for this?
Yes, I am struggling.
A computer crisis is also a good time to start rethinking things.
Usually, when I am stuck at my desk, typing away like a possesed machine, I take a break by stuffing my face.
The sweet things work wonders for keeping me awake while my eyes slowly turn square, but then of course, like with any dependancy, as soon as the rush is over, I need a next fix.
I am drinking water though, and fruits are sweet and good for munching.
I'm still trying to conclude the internal debate my mind is having on the subject of table tennis, but hey, weight watchers says it counts as excercise...
Another little feel good thing I have been doing is walking instead of taking a taxi.
I am told that this is actually working, and that people can see it in my clothes, but I still feel like a stuffed animal.
Just the thought of it could send me to chocolate...
Forgive me chocolate god, for I have sinned, it has been a week since my last chocolate, and I'm not doing to badly :D
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Day 1
Technically, we are only on Morning one, but for all intents and purposes...I got through a morning ok, thats HUGE! ( if you will pardon the pun)
My first meeting went off relatively successfully, minus the fact that I felt COMPLETLEY out of place as well, not a middle aged woman with a weight problem.
Apparently I can lose far more that I thought I could, which is a little scary actually.
The plus side (pun again, I apologise) of course, is that the scale actually let me get on, and, suprise, it is still in one piece.
So, I have my lunch all packed, healthy fruits and yoghurt, and armed with my water bottle, I'm going to make it through today without a single sweetie.
My small goal is 8kg in 8 weeks, that's not so bad, right?
Wish me luck...
My first meeting went off relatively successfully, minus the fact that I felt COMPLETLEY out of place as well, not a middle aged woman with a weight problem.
Apparently I can lose far more that I thought I could, which is a little scary actually.
The plus side (pun again, I apologise) of course, is that the scale actually let me get on, and, suprise, it is still in one piece.
So, I have my lunch all packed, healthy fruits and yoghurt, and armed with my water bottle, I'm going to make it through today without a single sweetie.
My small goal is 8kg in 8 weeks, that's not so bad, right?
Wish me luck...
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
The realisation
Oh who am I kidding?
I love the wonderfull theories on woman's size, but they don't help very much if you feel the size of a house!
I'm not quite sure if I got bullied into this (I would like to say I did), but truthfully, I know it's time to do something now.
I am about 20kg overweight (I think) and am starting to desperately miss my size 10 jeans.
So today is D-day! I have an appointment booked and Im off to start weight watchers (I know, I know, but I just can't do it on my own)
I intend to get rid of all my food frustrations- and I forsee many- here.
Anyways, here goes nothing...
Wish me luck
I love the wonderfull theories on woman's size, but they don't help very much if you feel the size of a house!
I'm not quite sure if I got bullied into this (I would like to say I did), but truthfully, I know it's time to do something now.
I am about 20kg overweight (I think) and am starting to desperately miss my size 10 jeans.
So today is D-day! I have an appointment booked and Im off to start weight watchers (I know, I know, but I just can't do it on my own)
I intend to get rid of all my food frustrations- and I forsee many- here.
Anyways, here goes nothing...
Wish me luck
Theories on size
What exactly is a winter woman?
According to one of my male friends, it’s a woman with a little (or not so little) bit of meat on her bones.
We were sitting having drinks one night, when he pointed out what I thought to be an average size woman and said: “Winter is coming.”
I asked him to explain, and apparently, bigger girls make good winter woman.
At first I was absolutely horrified.
I am pretty much the same size as her, and I have always thought I was average, but apparently I fall under the cuddly category?
Apparently the curves count for extra padding that act as a hot water bottle.
While scratching the last diet out of the cupboard and reaching for the nearest celery stick, I spent some time thinking about this concept of a winter woman.
If I consider the throngs of women I am introduced to by my male friends, and the women they spend time closely watching from across the bar (i.e. “perving” over), average is okay.
These are a bunch of “boob guys” and as one of them once pointed out to me, it’s got to be proportioned.
Even my baby brother (who is actually 15) says a girl needs to have something to hold on to.
Most men, it seems, understand that Barbie dolls are moulded out of plastic and pictures of supermodels are airbrushed.
According to half the articles you read in women’s magazines, men expect the average woman to look, well, average.
So why then do we spend half our lives obsessing over size?
I understand that there is a point where carrying too much weight can be unhealthy, but there is nothing more comical that watching a beautiful, average sized woman, standing in front of a mirror, pointing out her flaws.
You are probably the only person who sees those flaws, and think of this way, even the Sistine Chapel has a few cracks.
Besides, it is our flaws that makes us individual and sets us apart.
It’s the flaws that make an average woman unusual.
Weighing food and counting out portion sizes takes time.
It’s a waste of valuable time you could be spending doing something you enjoy, exercising or even just laughing.
Getting healthy doesn’t always have to mean dieting, but if you are going to be getting healthy, be careful of which processes you chose to do together.
I can safely say that quitting smoking and starting a healthy eating programme don’t go together, especially when you work next to a bakery.
Our bodies need some of these so called bad foods though, even if it is just to feel better and every woman deserves to feel good.
Of course you could just use an old friend’s justification: chocolate is made from coco, which comes from a plant, so it must be healthy.
The guys might be onto something with this winter warmth thing though, so if you will please excuse me, my winter wobbly bits are off to find a winter man.
* Published in Tygerburger 15 April 09
According to one of my male friends, it’s a woman with a little (or not so little) bit of meat on her bones.
We were sitting having drinks one night, when he pointed out what I thought to be an average size woman and said: “Winter is coming.”
I asked him to explain, and apparently, bigger girls make good winter woman.
At first I was absolutely horrified.
I am pretty much the same size as her, and I have always thought I was average, but apparently I fall under the cuddly category?
Apparently the curves count for extra padding that act as a hot water bottle.
While scratching the last diet out of the cupboard and reaching for the nearest celery stick, I spent some time thinking about this concept of a winter woman.
If I consider the throngs of women I am introduced to by my male friends, and the women they spend time closely watching from across the bar (i.e. “perving” over), average is okay.
These are a bunch of “boob guys” and as one of them once pointed out to me, it’s got to be proportioned.
Even my baby brother (who is actually 15) says a girl needs to have something to hold on to.
Most men, it seems, understand that Barbie dolls are moulded out of plastic and pictures of supermodels are airbrushed.
According to half the articles you read in women’s magazines, men expect the average woman to look, well, average.
So why then do we spend half our lives obsessing over size?
I understand that there is a point where carrying too much weight can be unhealthy, but there is nothing more comical that watching a beautiful, average sized woman, standing in front of a mirror, pointing out her flaws.
You are probably the only person who sees those flaws, and think of this way, even the Sistine Chapel has a few cracks.
Besides, it is our flaws that makes us individual and sets us apart.
It’s the flaws that make an average woman unusual.
Weighing food and counting out portion sizes takes time.
It’s a waste of valuable time you could be spending doing something you enjoy, exercising or even just laughing.
Getting healthy doesn’t always have to mean dieting, but if you are going to be getting healthy, be careful of which processes you chose to do together.
I can safely say that quitting smoking and starting a healthy eating programme don’t go together, especially when you work next to a bakery.
Our bodies need some of these so called bad foods though, even if it is just to feel better and every woman deserves to feel good.
Of course you could just use an old friend’s justification: chocolate is made from coco, which comes from a plant, so it must be healthy.
The guys might be onto something with this winter warmth thing though, so if you will please excuse me, my winter wobbly bits are off to find a winter man.
* Published in Tygerburger 15 April 09
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